Remember when Barney said the legen-wait-for-it-dary “I only have one rule…” one too many times?

“Never date short men” isn’t on my list.

I belong to a subspecies of womankind, who have developed an acute sense for sniffing out their own bullsh*t beliefs of relationships and soulmates. We believe that height is just a quality and not a deal breaker. Trust me, the “I’ll date you” pool for men not blessed in the height department does exist, and the women they’re looking for are not sparkling unicorns. They’re real and we live among you.

I have no doubt, majority of us women do reportedly prefer taller men because it makes us feel more feminine and protected. (I guess if your boyfriend or husband resembles a fortress and is complete with abs, it’s hard not to feel protected too.) And I would be lying to say that a man with height doesn’t get attention from the ladies, but what I’m pointing out here is that it is less important than what most people make it out to be. For every Chris Hemsworth (1.9m) whose height brings all the girls to their yard, there’s also a Tom Cruise (1.7m which coincidentally is the average height of men in Singapore).

Hey, before you fling a rotten banana in my face. I’m not saying 1.7m is short. Shortness is relative and in tinsel town, Tom Cruise is definitely below the height average. But I’ve digressed.

Just as the most “popular” girl back in school days doesn’t necessarily have to be the most beautiful girl there and the winner of a beauty pageant may pale in comparison to a prettier and leggier contestant but still takes the crown, “winning” in life and dating has less to do with looks and physical qualities like height. It has more to do with a combination of kicking “rules” out the door and charming people with personality.

couple at vacation

And maybe ladies, not all of us realise this, but when you’ve met the right guy, even if you had a height rule, you would bend it till it breaks into smithereens just for him. The earlier you realise this, the more exciting and varied your dating life will become.

In fact you know I was just talking about the “one rule”? When I was actively dating a couple of years back, I made one rule that led to my current fulfilling five-year relationship:

“Never date the same type of guy twice”

Here’s my public service announcement to all you ladies of the interwebs: a man, regardless how he looks, whether short or tall, dad bod (Parks and Recreation Chris Pratt) or ripped bod (post-Guardians of the Galaxy Chris Pratt), hot or not… can be a jerk or loving partner. The key word is if they want to.

If you’re on a quest for a man who offers you security and the ability to feel like a woman (whatever that means), then you’d best be looking out for a man who appreciates you and treats you right. If you’ve dated only tall guys and it ain’t getting you what you set out looking for, then I’d say it’s time you did something different.

Anyhow, was it not Einstein who said, “Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” How is dating any different?

He Says, She Says is a monthly column by Kenneth (he) and Carrie (she).

This month they share their thoughts about whether height is an obstacle to dating. Click this box to find out what a woman thinks.